My Daily Struggle

To my reader's, I thought I should come here and blog about recent events.  My brother-in-law has been diagnosed with stage 4 non-alcoholic liver disease aka NASH. I do feel like I know nothing about this horrible disease. However, I probably know more than you , my reader, just because I am learning about it as I go. He sleeps a lot due to the ammonia levels in his system.  He's extremely jaundice, which for anyone who doesn't know, he looks yellow, including the whites of his eyes.  Today seems to be a good day. He seems very alert and less confused than other times. Some days he is not alert, and can barely function.  We've called in hospice and he is currently under their care. I never thought I'd be 38 years of age and dealing with hospice for a brother! It's overwhelming to say the least. So much to do, learn and ask. We've received some great things from them to help him around the house to be independent. He is a guy that desires to be independent so...

I'm lost. I'm stressed beyond belief. I don't know what to do anymore. I messed up.  I am trying to do my best to take care of my brother-in-law, but I feel like I am failing at it. He needs to go to so many dr appointments and yet I feel like I have no time to do that. We found out that he has stage 3 liver cirrhosis. We are getting more tests to make sure it's not progressing to stage 4. I'm now his Power-of-Attorney and I worry that I'll mess up somehow and not do what is best for him. My fibromyalgia is making me so tired throughout the day at work, by the time I get home, I'm not able to do dishes or any house work. I eat and then I crash in bed. I hurt from head to toe. I feel like my husband doesn't understand how severe my pain is sometimes.  My husband is dealing with court and lawyers because of FAMILY! Other family is helping us out. It amazes me that family will stab you in the back this way, but other family helps you in your time of need. T...